...no one ever said.
Fear of rejection is the number one fear of humanity. The need to belong and be a part of a family is why gangs form, why sororities and fraternities are so important to many in college. It's why supper clubs, country clubs, teams, and church small groups all foster this feeling of "I matter to somebody and am a part of something". Yet it is in those same settings the risk is highest to be picked last for a team, to be left out of a gathering, and to be easily offended over some silly something.
It's in these scenarios where we are part of a pack that we feel at times rejected when we weren't included in a way we think we should have been or wish we would have been. It's in these times we might have had a responsibility to check an email to see something was going on or we may have actually not been left out at all but by us being busy, maybe we weren't pursued as much as we think we should have been. Here we go... thinking if we really mattered, if they really wanted me there they would have.......what? moved heaven earth? Or we create all sorts of things in our minds about how maybe we don't fit in, maybe they wouldn't even miss me, maybe I just seriously don't matter.
From there the tape plays over and over inside our heads the most horrible thing we "just knew" would eventually happen when we joined that team, group, or club. The tape screams "I DON'T MATTER! OH NO, I REALLY DON'T MATTER!" Then fear perpetuates the cycle. Decisions begin to be made to push people out, or to go into survival mode. It's part of the human condition Jesus came to save us from. So often it is a perceived lie that comes from a feeling of rejection and not even from true rejection.
What if you took a step back and took responsibity for your part of the situation, maybe got an outsider's point of view? You may find over and over, you were not rejected at all. Rather the tape in your head was drowning out logic. This is why scripture tells us to renew our minds with the Word of God. It's like the Word of God erases lies and plays truth inside of us that yields peace and joy instead of loss and chaos.
Example: Perfect love casts out fear. When we choose to meditate on that and the Word of God plays in our minds over and over we choose to love anyway letting love push that fear out. With that comes a boldness to feel wanted and a grace giving people the benefit of the doubt that they were not rejecting us all along. Of course there is true rejection we will most likely all face at some point and when that happens it is so good to have family and a few close friends in tact to walk with us through those few real storms! That's why it is so important not to let little silly things separate us from our tribe. Who is your tribe? Thank them regularly for being there. Be true to your tribe. Work out silly differences. Forgive often.
Happy Tuesday! Happy Monday yesterday! Sorry just getting this out. Yesterday was super busy. Please don't reject me because I didn't measure up & get this out yesterday. 😂😜😘 #ohwellhappyanyway #betterlatethannever #happysisterhood #sillystuffnotworthstress #rejection